Viscount Rupert Blocky page1
When my Grandfather died in October 1937, my father became Lord Blocky and in turn I became Viscount Rupert Blocky. It had been decided that when I went to boarding school, I was not to mention this, to avoid any special treatment. So I didn’t mention this to my friends in the dormitory, it wasn’t important to me at the time. I was just Blocky and that was it during the week.
At the weekend when May collected me, instead of the usual Austin 10 she normally drove. She arrived in the Rolls Royce car, traveling up the drive, all the teachers dashed to stand in line when May drove in, the school porter rushed to open the rear door expecting someone very important to step out.
When I ran forward and jumped into the rear seat and said to the porter put my kit in the boot Mr Tar-bottom. He hated his name being mentioned, preferring to be called porter.
This caused him to have a rush of blood to the head, grabbing me by my short trouser legs and trying to haul me out of the rear of the Rolls only succeeding in debagging me; he was standing with his trophy in his hand. The rest of the pupils surged forward to see what I was getting up to. Mr Grimly the Head Master tried in vain to regain some semblance of order. Things were rapidly getting out of hand. Until May barked an order sounding like a Sergeant Major, everywhere fell silent even the birds stopped singing.
I sat looking out of the window grinning at my three friends; they had not seen me in the Rolls before and were shouting to me,
‘Get out! get out! do you want to be expelled?’
May faced Mr Tar-bottom ‘Return those trousers to Viscount Rupert Blocky Immediately?’ As soon as the word Viscount was said he threw them high in the air as if they were on-fire, trying to assume the position of attention, whilst his mouth flapped rapidly without a sound coming from the gap.
The Head master Mr Grimly immediately offered his resignation bowing to May and calling her your Ladyship. May, seeing the look on Rupert’s friends faces, ‘put your kit in the boot with Rupert’s you’re coming with me as usual’. ‘Mr Grimly I must apologize for my slip of the tongue. On the instructions of Lord Blocky there will be no changes in Rupert’s education, he is to be treated like any other pupil, no special privileges, for security he has to be called Rupert is that understood. ‘Yes’
All that happened was that I picked up four boys as usual from school. I now consider the matter closed.’
For the first ten miles on the journey there was complete silence, not like the usual noise from four healthy boys talking about the last week and the tricks they played on others. ‘You’re very quiet boys, has the cat got your tongue’s?’
‘We have never even seen such a lovely car as this or one as big as this’. ‘Cor-blimey! We could all live inside here in the winter’ said Rupert’s three friends. Then the questions started, how fast will it go? Before May could answer, other questions were being fired at her. Is it hard to drive it? Where’s the other car? Have you pinched this one? Everyone laughed at the last question.
continued on Friday